'What does it mean to be adopted?' I was asked (Part 1)

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    What does it mean to be adopted? I was asked.

    It means you look into the mirror and your face disappears behind the silver backing. No one you know is reflected there. You would see, if you could see, no familiarity, only difference.

    It means you look into your next mothers eyes and nothing is reflected from the dullness of depression brought on by hostaging another womans child. She knows she will never know the child she holds.

    It means grandma will sit with you and read the Ten Commandments and know she did well to love and not leave her alcoholic husband. A virtuous woman, her children were born in the marriage bed. Being adopted means they think your mother was a slut, and you will be like her. The sins of the father . . . is whispered as you pass.

    Being adopted means you see the poster read the words sing the hymn and know Jesus loves all the little Children, all the little children of the world. Red and yellow, black and white, they are precious in his sight . . . so you have a friend. But he is not here so you conjure him and he comforts you. He comforts you when they ask; Where did you get that olive skin, those big brown eyes? You think of the spaniel in the pet shop with big brown eyes begging to be taken home to be taken home by anyone anyone who might want you.

    These people have not studied genetics, do not know two blue eyed parents cant have produced you, but they know something, they know how to make you anxious about your being.


    Sofie draws on her own experiences as an adopted child to try to give an insight into what it feels like to be adopted.