The Amputation part 1

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I truly believed it should be removed – my leg, that is. I would look down at it and feel that it didn’t belong to me. I could run and skip and jump. It worked beautifully and certainly looked a part of my body. It was long and firm and indeed an attractive shape, just like my other leg, but I truly felt that it was not a part of me. I felt very alone.

I mean, it was such a bizarre thought to remove my leg. I approached a doctor. He seemed a little reserved about it, but he did say he’s had such requests before, a long time ago and that he would book the operation for me through the local hospital. I would need to go through an agency too, so I approached one of the Christian organizations. They seemed very pleased to see me and said they sympathized with my situation. I was very relieved. They seemed to really listen. They said they had a number of one-legged women who would greatly appreciate my leg. These women were intelligent, educated and wealthy and they really desired to run and skip and jump as I could and they had worked so hard in their lives and really did deserve my leg. We didn’t really discuss how after the operation I wouldn’t be able to run, skip or even walk. The social worker did mention however that at some stage the leg would probably grow back and that thought comforted me a lot.

I had the operation. When I woke from the anaesthetic I felt so numb. I wasn’t game to look down at the stump that remained. People came to visit including my social worker and she gave me papers to sign to do with my now absent leg. She also gave me a white bandage, which she said I could put over my raw stump, and she told me I was a brave and wonderful person to be giving such a gift.

 

I truly believed it should be removed – my leg, that is.

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