53 years later

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    Ever since I can remember I knew I was adopted. Going to a Catholic school in the 1960's I was not the only one.

    I had a happy and stable childhood, always felt loved and belonged in our family of 4 including an adopted brother 21 months older than me.

    Curiosity awakened when I was 17 and needed my birth certificate to obtain my drivers license. I wondered about my 'original' one. Contacted Jigsaw and put my name down on their contact register.

    I then learnt about getting 'non identifying information' through Department of Community services. This was very exciting and shut me up for 20 years.

    After having children of my own, I needed to thank my birth mother for having me, I was told I could apply for her birth certificate which would give me my grandparents names.

    Thankfully I had a spinster Aunt who hadn't moved house in years nor changed her name.
    When I rang her to confirm if it was her sister she was so nonchalant “oh I know who you are- Adelaide right?

    I contacted a mediator through Relationships Australia in the Post Adoption Branch. She wrote a letter asking if she wished to contact and she rang back immediately saying 'it’s me your looking for.' I wrote her a letter and sent photos. I'll never forget getting her letter I was so emotional my daughter had to read it as I was so teary!

    When we met 2 months later it wasn’t as emotional as we had shared phone calls and letters.

    I have met a brother and sister and they have said their mum is not very involved with the family, I wonder if this was through her experience of giving me up?

    A year after finding my birthmother I finally found my birthfather. He and his family seem so much more accepting and welcoming.

    Having found my blood relations has filled such a void in me.

    I have studied my 'pedigree' chart extensively, but lately have become disillusioned with it.

    My daughter has just found out she’s pregnant and I can’t help but be supportive and nurturing towards her. She isn’t married but the father of baby and her are inseparable. The irony is she is due on my birthday. How times has changed from 3 generations ago. This has surfaced angry feelings of my grandparents. How dare they treat their own daughter like that?

    I’ve got the opinion now of not caring anymore about their history as they didn’t care about me.

     

    Disappointment towards my maternal grandmother

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